Great question——-a challenging task for parents and teachers————moreover a great task for Indian parent if the child is son——- no matter how much educated parent — no matter how much illiterate parent — a parent is a parent —-a mild heart—— spontaneous overflow of powerful emotions———————
21st century parents- especially ( age between 22+ to 40+) – who are enjoying the status of nucleus family — away from father and mother —- in other words — Pati- Patni — aur Ek Payara Sa BAchcha — Husband -wife and a lovely child —very passionate to watch You tube, Facebook and many more social sites —- a incomplete reader but a wise parent ————
Every parent thinks that —” Itna Talented- Itna Genius Bachcha — Kanha se Paida ho Gaya— child is so smart — asks rational questions — remind Father/mother—- “Father – you are lier”— smart child — handling all the apps smartly — but — ah — poor in academic performance — less concentration — does not want to read — does not want to write — but always ready to watch You Tube
REMEMBER —- Generally —-Normally ——-Either a child learns something (academic) in pressure or s/he learns something if she is self made child—————we find one child out of millions of children who is self made—— when we read or hear success story of a child ( mother peon/taxi driver/vegetable sellers) who becomes IAS, Qualifies IIT , NEET and other prestigious exam ————otherwise — normally a child performs well in studies in pressure —(pressure does not mean —- Pitayi—-or other types of punishment ) father and mother —- pressure can be in terms of minute observation —- sitting with child during study
How can I make my teenage son to pay attention in studies?
Always sit with child during study time
Check child’s homework /classwork
Ensure your child’s homework/ classwork -up to the mark
Please switch off your phone during your son/daughter study time
Set a rule for yourself
Look inside yourself —- introspect yourself — how can a parent ask his child — not to use mobile so much —- when a child observes that his father/mother always busy with mobile
Remember — Bhasan se Kaam Nahi chalega — words will not be valuable — if your child finds difference between your words and action — do not create a conflict personality ————thousands of examples can be written —- even you may know it ——
If you wish your child to pay attention in studies ——- BE A STUDENT—-during your child’s study time ————all problems will be solved ——— it works with every parent — no matter a parent’s — social status — and other things — you are literate or illiterate————Be a student at the time of your child———-
If a parent says ——no time for kids ——————— then no need to discuss above mentioned things ——————hard truth of life—- Money requires for education ——but education can be not purchased without spending time and money for your kids——on your kids ———IF you are ready to spend time ——-—————your teenage son will surely pay attention in studies———
Education helps to develop a better understanding for the self. Educated person perceives self and society. Education develops the ability to think independently, rationally, critically and creatively. Education imparts conscience. Conscience helps us to live a meaningful life. In fact we know a conscious person develops a better understanding for self and surrounding.
Comprehensive sexuality education (CSE) is need of 21st century globalized children for living a healthy life. It is time to empower children and young age people without making differences among caste, creed and culture. Comprehensive sexuality education (CSE) is one of the unrecorded fundamental rights of children. We have rights to accept the thing as it exists.
Great philosopher and international spiritual ‘guru’ Rajnish quoted “truth is truth, and nobody should debar from it”. What is wrong with comprehensive sexuality education (CSE)? Tell it the way it is. What can we hide from our children? Children are very perceptive. Even if we do not tell them, they will discover it on their own. They are smart, intelligent and equipped with Smart phone.
World Wide Web dissolves all the layers and differences between caste and creed, educated and uneducated, literate and illiterate elite class and down trodden, poor and rich. World Wide Web has brought one of the greatest revolution. We are witness of this revolution.
Can we stop our child inquiring about sexuality? We cannot stop the natural flow of a river? Water always finds out its way to move ahead. It goes towards down and down. If we cannot stop natural journey of water, so what should be we do? A wise person channelizes the strength of water and gives it right direction. Sexuality possesses the nature of water. Comprehensive sexuality education channelizes intrinsic impulses of children in right direction.
Parent and teacher face a big question when it comes for educating their child about comprehensive sex education. We do not find a big difference between developed countries and developing countries. Only on difference I could find out that is legalizing age for giving consent for sex and marriage, other than this we work as moral police. Asian countries’ legal age of consent for sexual activity varies from age 12 to 21. (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ages_of_consent_in_Asia).
Age of consent for sexual Activity
13 years , 15 years
South Korea, North Korea
Austria, Germany, Hungary, Italy and Prorogues
Greece, Poland, Sweden
Belgium, Netherlands, Spain and Russia
If globalized citizen consider that 13 years old boys and girls can give consent for intercourse then we need to think to provide comprehensive sex education to our kids’ right from tender age to save them from several unwanted diseases. Growth of a child from ignorant child to a smart child is changed due to prosperity in our life, better living standard and different food habits. Scientific research study reveals that maturity of a girl child can happens at the age of 7 years. (https://www.aap.org). It is necessary to develop a comprehensive curriculum to develop appropriate knowledge and skills to love a healthy sexual life.
UNESCO recognized comprehensive sexuality education as an age-appropriate, culturally relevant approach to teaching about sexuality and relationships by providing scientifically accurate, realistic, nonjudgmental information* (UNESCO, 2009. International Technical Guidance on Sexuality Education).
What are common advantages of comprehensive sexuality education?
Develop physically and mentally a healthy citizen
Keep away from sexual transmitted disease/infections i.e. HIV,
Reduce teenage unwanted pregnancy
Reduce domestic violence
Education is the greatest remedies for coming out from several catastrophes in our life. Comprehensive sexuality education will empower children and young age people to take necessary precautions for living a healthy life. Precaution is better than cure.
Sexual desire and sexual intimacy are intrinsic and impulsive in its nature. We can hide and we can forcefully stop it but we cannot efface it. Rational education imparts skills, values and knowledge among us. Sexuality education addresses most sensitive aspects of human life. Comprehensive sexuality education programme should sensitize the young age people for developing positive values towards gender differences and awareness for own physical and mental development at this stage.
Age appropriate comprehensive sexuality education
Educated world citizen considers importance of age appropriate comprehensive sexuality education. What should be taught at particular age group children? How much should be taught at particular age group children? We are living in a data world. Children smartly handle smart phone at the age of 5. Children become smart at the age of 8 and develop sensitive nature towards opposite sex. Comprehensive sexuality education curriculum should cater the need of these smart children.
Scientifically accurate comprehensive sexuality education
Generally children inquire different information with the materials available on Web World Wide (WWW) which may or may not be written by expert people. Web World Wide (WWW) has fathomless resources written on sexuality education. Expert people know the technical and scientifically importance of different physical development and different physical and mental need of human beings. To be Ignorant is better than incomplete knowledge. When we don’t know about something, we show hesitation to do experiments in our life due to various reasons but when we know something incompletely, incompleteness gives us a sense of achievement and confidence which leads us to experiment with the ideas that possibly leads to bad health i.e. (a) how to keep ourselves neat and clean during periods, (a1) myth and facts about periods (b) how to use contraceptive pill or other available medication to avoid pregnancy,(c) how to use condom to avoid unwanted pregnancy and other transmittable diseases i.e. HIV , (d) when to consult doctor for discussing different bodily changing symptoms, (e) how to keep hygiene during oral sex, (f) why to avoid doing sexual activities at age between (8-15-16-) (g) with whom should we discuss sex related problems at first, (h) What are dos and do not before indulging in sexuality, (i) how to share it with other, (j) other myth and facts about sexuality. Scientifically based education will help our children and young age people to live a healthy life.
Cultural appropriate comprehensive sexuality education
Human beings are socially connected to each other. We accept and respect the existence of other family members and society members. We are unique but we are culturally dependent on each other which help us to live in a peace and harmony. Sexuality is big taboo word for the society. It is universal truth but we are hiding so many things to other person due to cultural connection. Game of hide and seek leads to health hazards. Parents and teachers avoid healthy discussion on sexuality. We face a great question before starting a healthy discussion on sexuality with our children and young age people,(a) how to start it (b) who will start it. We face same dilemmatic situation as “who will bell the cat” due to cultural perspectives.
Cultural limitation and restriction are big hurdles for imparting comprehensive sexuality programme at world level. If comprehensive sexuality education programme is developed and customized to address different cultural limitation, then only we will be successful in imparting it for common people. Comprehensive sexuality education programme has a great vision to sensitize young generation, “how to keep ourselves healthy”. Comprehensive sexuality education programme sensitizes world citizen to be protective, active and alert for own healthy life.
Comprehensive sexuality education on realistic ground
Sexuality is a taboo word for each one of us. We know its reality but we avoid decorating in words. We cannot neglect the reality to keep our young age general healthy. Sexuality related education programme will help our child to take a wise step. If we fail to educate them, then it will be more hazards for them. They inquire and investigate it through several unreliable sources i.e. friends, World Wide Web (www) and other cheap resources. Comprehensive sexuality education helps children to grow wisely and keep themselves healthy.
Comprehensive sexuality education with nonjudgmental information
Healthy and integrated children can think and perform better. How to impart comprehensive sex education is the biggest challenge for different policy and educational stakeholders? What are the specific words chosen for imparting sex education? Do words create negative impact on child? Wise educator and parent use appropriate words to impart sexuality education. Wise educator use simple and concrete words to describe essential facts and concepts. Educator avoids a situation where child confuses himself with complex and confusing words. Essential truth of life should be shared in nonjudgmental form and our words and phrases consist of deep meaning based on facts.
Wise parent and educator express truth of life in as simple as sexuality “is”.
“Time and tide wait for none” sensitizes all of us about the importance of time. Wise person feels and acts on essence of this proverb. Everyone has only 24 hours in a day. Our fortune is decided by the way we utilize our time. Quality of being punctual is one of the greatest virtues of person. What is punctuality? Punctuality is conscious effort to complete a task on time. Punctuality is etiquette. A punctual person always lives a complacent life.
Punctuality- What does punctuality mean? How do we develop sense of punctuality in children?
Punctuality is an attitude. Punctual people always respect the values of time. Everyone has same time but some people utilize it rationally and some people show carelessness. This makes a big difference in our life. What does punctuality mean? How do we develop sense of punctuality in children? How to we develop self awareness for punctuality in children? Oxford Dictionary defines punctuality as arriving, doing something, or happening at the expected time/correct time, timely, on time etc. In fact, these are essential qualities of a punctual person.
Punctuality is an essential skill to live an integrated life.
Parent, teacher and surroundings play great role in developing a sense of punctuality among children. Parent lays the foundation of developing right habit of punctuality. Punctuality is essential skill to live a peaceful and happy life. Sense of being late develops stress in our life. Stress is mother of diseases in our life. Therefore, if we wish to live a stress free and peaceful life, we should develop this habit right from the childhood. Human being always aspires to explore and learn new things in life. When a child starts forming a habit, we should initiate developing sense of being punctual at this stage. It can be ridiculous to think but this starts with developing habit of waking up in the morning at certain time, going washroom, brushing and bathing on same time. Gradually it helps a child to prepare himself for going to school on time. Generally it is observed that child does not wake up at right time because parent could not make him ready for school at right time so that child reaches bus stop late and story goes so on and so forth.
Child observes culture of his family.
Punctuality is prime skill that should be instilled when a child’s mind able to recognize and learn new things. Parent creates a positive aura for this. Child observes culture of his family. If he finds a gap between words and action either by guardian, parents, or elder family members then he starts ignoring your moral boost up. It may be difficult task for a parent to follow the sense of punctuality at home, but child copies different habits directly from parent. Habit is not an inborn quality of man. We start learning it right from our childhood. Generally it is observed, if parent is punctual in performing different tasks at home, child easily grasps it and acts accordingly in different situations.
Help your child to prepare him in advance before school time
Parent prepares his child to go to school on time. We should instill habit of reaching on bus stop at right time. Sensitize your child to complete all necessary activities on time to reach bus stop timely every day. In fact, the day a child initiates himself to reach bus stop on time, parent achieves his target. When we talk to school driver for reporting late in the school, they always share interesting story of different parent. Driver has to wait to receive the child because parent did not send child on time. It may be ego issue with some parents but sometimes parent fails to prepare their child on time due to various family reasons.
Keen Observation, frequent reminder and check ensure completion of work on time
To complete a task on time is characteristic feature of successful students. We observe in the classroom that out of 10 students in a class 6 students always complete their class work and home work on time, 2 students complete it slight late and teacher works very hard for last two students to complete the work on time even then students could not do. These students’ have habit of delaying the task. They know how to complete the task but use a casual way/disinterestedness. Parent can play a crucial role here. If s/he observes her child on daily basis, remind him to complete the task and follow him to check whether he has completed the task or not can be the best techniques to develop a sense of punctuality in the child.
Rapid change in our life styles and our life
Life styles have been changing rapidly in every 2 years. It is amalgamated in our family life. Wise parent tries his best to maintain a balance. If a parent develops a rule to go to bed daily on a particular time, child starts doing this. It becomes his habit; he cannot stop himself going to bed on time. We ask our child to go to bed on time but do not go to bed ourselves on time. This creates a conflict of interest between child and parent. Parent is role model for his son and daughter. Child learns several good or bad habits directly from coping his father and mother. Do we complete some tasks on time? Can we awake at right time and go to bed on right time? Can we fulfill promises to our kids on time? Do we reach to bus stop/railway station/airport on time to avoid hassle? Our child is noticing us. We need not to talk much but our action speaks a lot and can have great impact on our child.
At Initial Stage of Life:-
Help your child to awake at right time
Help your child to brush and bath on time
Help your child to prepare school bag on time
Help your child to reach bus stop on time
Help your child to complete home work on time
Help your child to go to play ground on time
Help your child to finish lunch and dinner on time
Help your child to do self study on time
At Later Stage of Life:-
Through parent’s keen observation and timely reminder, child will surely develop an attitude to become punctual in his life.
When we talk on importance of time, we should give respect to each task so that we can perform that task on time. Child is completely an empty pot what we show to our kids, that reflects in his personality. Punctuality is an attitude which demands strong will power and determination to complete a task on time. It demands a lot of sacrifice from us. Guardian motivates and encourages a child’s right act at right time so that child can feel intrinsic motivation for performing day to day task with a sense of being punctual. Child does not learn several things on putting pressure.
Wise parent creates positive aura and positive culture at home, so that children develop right understanding for different values of life, which is essential for us and lays the foundation of an integrated personality.
Student Misbehavior- parents responsible for children’s bad behavior
Human being understands language of love, emotion and passion. Educator handles 21st century kids in the school. Kids are active and smart. Sophisticated gadgets become essential need for survival. Nowadays, parent nurtures a child in a nucleus nature. 2010s decade born children are vocal and electronic gadgets lover. Parents wish to provide all the luxuries for their children, which a 1980s-1990s born parent might not used/might, not be available for them to use at that time. Parents are economically sound.
Every parent of this world is intelligent and intellectual personality for his kids. They think surely better for their kids. Children learn all the values right from tender age of habit formation. They watch each and every activity of their parent at home. Nowadays, parent offers his smart phone to the kids in a very tender age because child will be engaged and s/he could perform day to day task at home. Parent fulfills all the wishes of his kids. This activity satisfies need of both parent and child; parent feels relax and child also feels mental relax with voice, pictures, songs, video, video games etc. Every time we repeat same activities that lay the foundation of negative behavior in a child.
My friend mr. Yadav was in a party with his elder and younger son. His elder son (40 months old) child was watching a serial Bal Hanuman. Younger son (15 months old ) child was crying so Mr. Yadav wanted to give him mobile. When Mr. Yadav requested his elder son to give the mobile for his younger brother, he had thrown the mobile in the ground and ran away from there. I was completely confused to see all these activities. In fact this is common scene in country side as well as urban area. Who is responsible for this act? Who will be cursed for this act?
Illiterate, literate, educated and uneducated parent stated several times in informal or formal communication, “ I think, (a) child should not be pressurized (b) I do not give pressure on my child (c) child does not study in a pressure (d) sir, s/he does not hear anyone in the family (e) sir, s/he is very rigid (f) sir, his mind is very sharp, s/he operates Smart phone very fast (g) sir, s/he does not want to write on notebook. If I ask something, s/he replies very fast but does not write at all. I stuck at the moment, (a) who will correct them (b) who is responsible for this rigid behavior (c) if a child does not listen/hear/obey his/her father/mother at home; how will s/he hear/obey teacher at school and in the classroom?
Parent spends a lot of money on paying school fee. S/he wishes her child to be a unique person. Parent builds child’s strong personality at home. Whatever a child learns at home, s/he carries it to the school and classroom. Parent inculcates different human values at home.
A paradoxical situation is occurred in child life. Parent allows child to do all good and bad things without any obstruction and reminder at home but expect different school stakeholder teacher, principal and other person to inculcate all human values. Homeschooling fails to do it; formal schooling fails to create magical effect in the school which resulted in a conflict personality.
Parent is an image builder. A child learns a lot of values at home. Parent’s nurturing style makes a big difference. When a child passes through a tender age, parent ignores all his/her mistakes and fulfills all demands unconditionally. Parent wants to provide the best facility available in the society. We treat each and every bad behavior of a child as his/her childish nature but we forget that child is framing a behavior, a habit and an attitude which is not good for both the stakeholders. Gradually, we start noticing that child becomes so rigid and inflexible. Once a child frames a set of good or bad habit, it becomes too much difficult to mould in positive direction. Parent feels unable to control because now child does not listen/obey his parent. Child has his own condition to do several activities. Parent becomes apprehensive and fearful to take necessary action to mould his behavior.
Parents nurturing style at home plays crucial role in child’s behavior formations. Why does a child misbehave at school? Does a parent instill values at home? We observe various reasons for child misbehavior at home and at school.
Ill treated parents
Child is nature. S/he blooms in the lap of parental field. Proper development of a child is prime responsibility of a parent. Generally we observe in family, society and school that sensible parent nurtures his/her child sensibly. If a parent is not so much caring for his/her kids and s/he does not want to spend time with kids, then his kids do not show moderate behavior at school.
No guardianship at home
Parent physical presence at home makes a big difference but if a parent is present at home but does not care his kids can create too big difference. It creates a void in a child’s life. Sensible guardianship at home helps child to behave properly at home. Child becomes a torn personality.
Lack of poor observation and guidance at home
Mother plays great role in shaping a child as a good human being. Mother usually shares her observation with husband and finally they take a wise decision for their kids. If parent could not keep his/her child in proper observation and if s/he fails to guide child in right direction then child becomes a torn personality.
Over protected and over possessed students
If a parent is so much possessive and over protective for his/her child, then child forms a negative attitude which reflects everywhere i.e. in family, society and school. Over protective child customizes each and everything according to his/her wish and present himself as a victim before parent. Parent takes this issue as an ego-“my son/my daughter”. 21st century kids are smart. They know their parent weakness. This attitude outcome is always negative. Generally it is observed that overprotective and over possessive parent misbehaves with teacher in school, shouts in school office or so and so many. Parent’s pampered students
So many parents feel too much pride for their son and daughters. They pamper their child. Pampered child behaves same as over protected and over possessed child.
Having feelings of superiority complex or inferiority complex due to various individual as well as environmental aspects i.e. educated family, uneducated family, poor or wealthy life styles, physical stature. School is a pious place. Everyone wears same uniform and studies under a same roof. Everyone pays same amount of school fee. Sometimes it is observed that it is parent who develops a superiority complex in his/her child; his child behavior is not praiseworthy in the school.
We are living in a globalized world. Everyone has same opportunity to avail existing facilities in this world. A wise parent develops positive attitude right at the beginning of childhood. Gradually, child becomes habituated to show human values with parent, family members, society and teachers.
Wise parent develops his child as a sensible citizen who cares for self and society. A child is a child; pure, pious and virtuous. Parenting makes a big difference. Let, be a smart and sensible parent for nurturing a better world citizen !
Sex Education for Children: Need To Implement Effective Sexuality Education Programme
Decision making is a process. In fact, it is a thought process. It is a skill. Decision making is an essential life skill. Life skill can be learnt to live an integrated life.
Integration of intuition, emotion and rational thinking help us to take a wise decision.
Child is gift of God. God provides us unique capacity to survive in the world. Child is a spontaneous individual. He can say ‘no’ or ‘yes’ instantly. He can leave good thing and can cry for trivial thing. Everyone realizes the beauty of a child in our life. Child is free from one the biggest worry of the world, ‘what’ other will think for him. A child is spontaneous thinker. S/he is a natural decision maker. Generally, his/her decision is based on his likes and dislikes. A child takes decision without fear of others.
We are world citizen. Our life styles changes very fast. Kids become crazy in this virtual world. They love to spend much of their time on smart phone. Nowadays a child can forget to take lunch / completing homework on time. They may not show much interest in learning but they need smart phone/laptop to see their favourite programmes. Parent faces a big challenge in deviating child’s attention from smart phone or smart laptop. Parent makes aware his kids, ‘what is good or bad’ for life. They are kids. They will show rigidity and stubbornness but parent makes him sensible.
A wise parent develops good habit in child’s habit formation stages. A wise parent establishes the values by providing ample opportunities and facilities rationally right from childhood i.e. when a child does not know the values of his demand but becomes a rigid boy/girl based on his/her likes and dislikes. Experience people remarks that there is a thin layer difference between likes and dislikes at early stage of life. Child may be unable to differentiate between these two. Parent inculcates right values and helps his ward to develop decision making skill at right time and right place.
When we observe children in our family, society, school, market and in a branded national or international shopping centre, we closely observe the decision making skill of kids at different situations. Of course they know what to share, what to demand and at what place to demand. A five years old child never ever demands chocolate/ice-cream in a medical shop. They demand different eatable items in a sweet shop and different toys in a toy shop.
Parent nurtures his kids in a good manner. A wise parent develops decision making skill in his wards through using different tools and techniques at different situations.
A wise parent spends quality time with his child. Decision making skill should be developed through inculcating good manner at early stages because at this juncture a child only understands the word ‘good and bad’. A parent develops decision making through good habit, and through using external source of motivation. Parent inculcates habit of brushing teeth regularly, taking healthy breakfast timely, and reaching bus stop on time, completing class work and homework on time, returning back to home on time after playing in the evening, watching television and using mobile etc on time. Parent motivates his child, if s/he shows moderate behaviour. It counts as a good habit but right habit formation leads to develop a sense of decision making skill. Gradually, child takes decision that he will go to bed in time because it is 10.00pm. S/he herself or himself can ask for a glass of milk, if he takes it on daily basis.
Decision of buying a laptop by Ms. Sonali of class 6th
A good parent always talks to his wards for involving him in decision making. Mr. Chandan is a primary teacher in a government school. He wanted to buy a laptop. He decided a budget of 25000 for the laptop. His elder daughter Sonali studies in 6th class in a reputed school. She searched each and everything on Google and suggested her father to buy a laptop costs 37 thousands. She was very happy and shared all necessary information with her father. Mr. Chandan has only 25 thousand in the bank account. If he would buy choice of Sonali, he will lend money on interest. Mr. Chandan sat with his daughter and discussed real problems with Sonali. Sonali got upset because that was one of the best laptop and two other classmates’ father had already bought that configuration too; even she had talked her computer teacher regarding this laptop. Notwithstanding, Sonali went to market with her Uncle and bought the choice of her father, and was very happy after bringing the laptop at home. Mr. Chandan had arranged 37thousands in advance but first he discussed with Sonali, gave her opportunity to think what would be the best for family. Sonali came up with rational decision which suited to her and family too. Sonali is only 11 years old and have great passion for latest technology but made right decision although she pressurized her father to buy costly laptop but later on she bought laptop.
What do we think? What was the role of Sonali father? How did he nurture Sonali? Mr. Chandan helped her to identify objective of buying the laptop. A wise parent makes his/her child sensible enough to indentify the purpose of any task. If a child is able to identify his/her need, surely s/he will take a rational decision.
How to do we get? What are benefits?
When discussing for buying laptop, Mr. Chandan discussed with Sonali about process of procurement of the items. The laptop which Sonali wanted to purchase, it was not available in nearby town. She had to buy it online but one of Mr. Chandan friend offered him discount of 500 Rupee on the laptop. So, Sonali thought that she will not only buy laptop very soon that fulfils her need but will also save Rs. 500, which can be spent on other family expenditure.
What are the best possible alternatives?
Mr. Chandan helped her daughter to realize that although her choice was very nice but she has only 25 thousands in her hand to buy. He helped Sonali to think other possible alternate (different company) before taking final decision.
What does our wisdom say?
Sonali was very rigid to buy costly laptop because so many of her classmates bought that laptop. She wants to show her high stature among her friends. Her father asked her questions. What do you want? Do you want that I should lend money on interest? Do you know our source of income? How will I pay? Do we really need to buy laptop of such configuration? It was hardly 10 minutes discussion between father and daughter but result is before us. We are experienced and educated people. We know things in a better way. Parent sole purpose is to sensitize his/her kids. Our kids are sensible, they will develop right understanding. Our task is to make them aware because it may be possible that s/he visualizes something according to her age and understanding.
Decision making skills grow in real life experience
Wise parent leads his ward to walk on right path. He initiates ways and provide different opportunity through different means and medium to nurture the decision making skill in his child. He helps his wards to pass through different situations to feel the pulse of right and wrong decision and its consequences in our life.
Mr. Bhola Singh was an astute farmer. He used to ask his son if he had to help other needy farmer in terms of sending his own tractor to plough the field. Mr. Nilabh recalled his childhood memories. He flashed back and shared, “I did not feel the importance of the particular questions, asked by my father. I did not remember now, “what was my father’s decision in such situation, but he used to ask me and I used to give answer at that time”. Now, I felt that my father used to make me a sensible person, indeed a decision maker.
Parent plays central role in developing decision making skill among students. S/he can assign simple task to make them sensible to take a wise decision according to need. Usually, student initiates to complete the task interestingly as well as enthusiastically.
a. Ranjay’s father announced that his son will do marketing for kitchen. Ranjay will buy kitchen items from Hypermart. His father has given only Rs. 1000. Ranjay will check kitchen items and make a list of necessary items for purchasing. He will identify essential and luxury kitchen items. He has to decide and buy kitchen items so that his mother would be able to cook today’s dinner uninterruptedly.
b. Tappu is younger son of Mr. Gopal. Usually Tappu does not eat green vegetable on regular basis and always complains his mother for other alternative vegetables for lunch or dinner time (which his mother could not cook at particular day). Mr. Gopal found out a solution. He has given Rs. 100 for buying green vegetables for the family. He encouraged Tappu to visit nearby ‘Vegetable Market’ for shopping. He will purchase green vegetable of his own choice which other family members will eat in dinner.
Help to set priority in life- essential decision making skill
Mr. Nishant son was appearing for the intermediate board examination. His son was an average academic performer in examination driven education system but was a sensible child. He was properly preparing for his board examination. It was only 14 days remain for commencement of examination. Suddenly, he came to know that his maternal uncle was going to marriage after 8 days. Mr. Nishant knew that there was a great emotional bonding between Ayush and his maternal uncle. Mr. Nishant caught in a dilemma. If Ayush goes to attend marriage ceremony, it will take at least four days. If he leaves Ayush at home then who will take care of food etc. Ayush was doing unique planning for last six month for his uncle marriage I.e. purchased different dress for different ceremony. Mr. Nishant had a discussion with his wife. It was matter of great tension and emotional turbulence in Nishant family. Ayush skipped breakfast and lunch and did not study whole day but everything was normal at dinner table. Finally, Ayush decided to stay at one of his father close friend house for preparing for the board examination. What do we think i.e. how did he decide this, what were points of discussion in the family and what could be other emotional ups and downs faced by other family member?
Parent shows faith in ward’s ability to take rational decision
A wise parent sometimes takes serious challenges to develop decision making skill in his child. He motivates his child to think his own but provides several points before him to consider before taking final decision. It may be possible that sometimes child may select less important thing or can do useless decision, wise parent accepts the decision of his ward but he also encourages his ward to evaluate and assess the outcome of previously taken decision so that process of learning in real life situation can continue.
Decision making is a life skill. Skill helps us to grow. Decision making involves thousand of factors. A wise parent nurtures his/her ward’s capacity to take a wise decision. He develops the ability to understand the importance of decision making and decision making process to lead an integrated life. We have to accept the universal truth that “Nobody can decide anything for us. Of course, others can help us to do so, but the decision has to be ours. I am accountable for my destiny. It is “I” who has to take right decision at right time. We remember quotes of French philosopher, René Descartes (1596-1650) who proposed a ‘truth’: Cogito ergo sum (I think, therefore I am). A wise parent develops his ward as an independent individual thinker who can think rationally and accept the challenges of his own decision. He says, “I think it is very well’; I am going to do this. He can say, “I have taken this decision because I think (point 1, point 2 so and so forth). Parent will say ‘yes you can’; I believe in you. Nurture an independent decision maker. A child is unique individual; we will not make him/her a parasite.
Learning is complex phenomena. Learning something is good when we learn it consciously; when we learn something (good/bad) in an awaken and alert mode; when we face it in real life situation; when we believe in our own capability to learn something; when we have strong will power and determination; that day, if we decide to sail the life boat in opposite direction of the wind even then we will certainly reach our destination.